Night Owl

Obviously that last little experiment didn't work. I ended up going to bed before 11:30 pm! In fact, all week I've been hitting the hay much earlier than is normal for this-here night owl. But please take note: it is 8:40 AM now, so there is not a money-back guarantee for the time you are about to waste reading my blog. I cannot vouch for the quality of my writing unless it is done after 11:45 PM. Circadian rhythms, or... something like that. Astrology?

I blame my messed-up internal clock entirely on early-morning seminary. It simply is not natural for a teenager to get up at 4:30 in the morning to participate in religious instruction. It compromised my circadian rhythm in my formative years and I have never been the same. I lived just outside of Boston when I started high school and seminary. It was a 15 minute drive to the church we attended on Sundays. Every weekday morning before school my sister and I went to an early-morning seminary class at the same building. The years my mother was an instructor we went with her. But one year we feared for our lives daily as a teenage boy gave us a ride. He careened down windy New England roads nearing 90 MPH in his old Caddy - Hostess Ding Dongs and Twinkies rattling and rolling back and forth across the back window ledge as we took corners on two wheels. We told him to slow down. We told him, "You are scaring us!" He was what you might call "socially awkward" and apparently the direct approach didn't phase him. Teens don't usually tattle... but we were so frightened we eventually told our parents we were scared to drive with him. They had a little chat with this boy, but I don't remember him easing up on the gas. If I remember correctly, we eventually made other arrangements for our carpool. A few years later I repeatedly ran into this guy at BYU. Luckily it was always on campus between classes so he never offered me a ride anywhere. Dodged a bullet there. I wonder what happened to him... Nascar would seem a logical career path... But somehow I don't think so.

For as long as I can remember I have known I was not a "morning person". I remember staying up long after being put to bed as a child reading books, playing games with my sister, choreographing dance moves to Michael Jackson's latest hit, rearranging furniture... whatever. And I have always loved to sleep in. It must have been so excruciatingly painful for my parents to get me out the door to school every day. There were times my mom had to actually pry the blankets from my grip to get me out of bed. My bad habit of being late to everything started this early in life. I would love to get a hold of my school records and see if my "on times" actually outnumbered my "tardies". I doubt it.

By the time I got to high school my late night activities were permanently ingrained in my daily habits. I'm trying to recall what I did with all of that time. Here is what I can remember:

writing in my journal
reading
drawing
painting
organizing drawers and closets
rearranging furniture
writing poetry
writing love notes
singing
listening to Janet Jackson
making a list of everything in my room (insurance purposes?)
dancing in front of the mirror
calling radio stations
doing homework
reading scriptures
redecorating my room

I can only imagine the creative ways I might have wasted away precious sleeping hours if I had had a computer and the internet. I'm glad I didn't because as I take a look at my list, I see that my late-night parties-of-one were the breeding ground for every creative talent I have. I see my sleep habits as a weakness, but I choose to embrace the creative fruits of my bad habit instead of berating myself.

I know my sleeping habits are an annoyance to others at times. My husband: when he wants to be super-productive on Saturday mornings. My kids: when they want breakfast. Anyone who tries to telephone me before 10 AM: there is no guarantee I will answer the phone. If you do by chance talk to me just after I have woken up, don't ask me any important questions, expect me to be able to schedule anything on a calendar, and certainly don't give me any information you expect me to be able to recall later. Consider yourself warned. If you want my full and complete attention, call between 10 PM and 2 AM. I am very cooperative and alert during these business hours.

So when do I sleep? Oh, I am a top-notch napper. If napping were an Olympic sport I would be a gold-medalist. It is tricky finding appropriate times to nap having young kids at home. I still stick to the old adage of "sleep when the baby sleeps", even though the baby is now almost 10 months old. I'm sure I'll still be "sleeping when the baby sleeps" when she is 2, 3... 18. I was going to write, "I wish there was a graveyard shift for moms." But the fact is moms are on call 24 hours a day. So is it wrong to just get my sleep when I can and when I want to? Maybe I chose just the right profession for someone with my sleeping tendencies. And now you know why I cannot and will not be able to ever home-school my children. Unless they want to have art, dance, and writing lessons at 2 AM...