The Magic of Gratitude

Today Taylor and I spoke in church. A few people asked for a copy of this talk, so I've just posted it here for their reference. I learned some amazing things about gratitude while studying for this. Don't feel like you have to read this whole thing, but if you do and you enjoy it... then Happy Thanksgiving!

The Magic of Gratitude

Carriage Hills Sacrament Meeting Talk

November 20, 2011

As I have researched the topic I’ve been asked to speak about, I have decided it is like MAGIC!  

...it turns whatever we have into enough...and more.

...it unlocks the fullness of life.  

… it saves us.

...it magically blesses you AND everyone around you at the same time.

...it _ makes _  you _  happy. Anytime. Anywhere. In any circumstance.

It’s like magic!

What is this principle of the gospel that can do so much in a way that seems almost magical?  

Gratitude.  The answer is gratitude.  Gratitude is like magic.

¡Gracias! Grazie! When a Spanish or Italian speaker says thanks, they are invoking one of the meanings behind the word grace. That’s because grace, gracias,  and grazie  all descend from the same Latin word, grātia, which means (1) a pleasing quality, (2) favor or goodwill, and (3) gratitude or thanks.

Yes, gratitude is MORE than just giving thanks.  Gratitude is:

-a feeling

-an expression

-an experience

-Gratitude is an altered perspective

-an attitude

-a habit

-a successful mode of living

-Gratitude can be a coping response

-a recipe for personal happiness

-Gratitude is always an invitation for the Spirit of the Lord to be in your life

-Gratitude is faith in action

-GRATITUDE IS AN ACTION

And this is where I would like to focus my remarks about the magical properties of gratitude:  GRATITUDE IS AN ACTION

1) What is gratitude?  CHARITY IS GRATITUDE IN ACTION

2) Why have gratitude? GRATITUDE IS A COMMANDMENT BECAUSE IT SAVES US

3) How can we cultivate gratitude? PRAY FOR AND PRACTICE GRATITUDE

1) What is gratitude?  CHARITY IS GRATITUDE IN ACTION

When gratitude is manifested as an “action” it is also known as “charity”, or “the pure love of Christ”. There! Already gratitude has magically changed from what we once thought was just a feeling or to utter a “thank you” to a gesture that deserves the grand title of “Charity”.   Gratitude is the fertile soil out of which the fruits of charity grow.  John F. Kennedy said, “As we express our gratitude we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them.”   

For example:

We show gratitude for temple blessings by attending the temple often to help extend those blessings to others.

We can show gratitude for our material blessings by paying a generous fast offering.

Thus gratitude is the seed of charity, the pure love of Christ.

2) Why have gratitude? GRATITUDE IS A COMMANDMENT BECAUSE IT                          SAVES US

We also learn in D&C 59 that gratitude is a commandment.  In nothing doth Man offend God, or against none is his wrath kindled, save those who confess not his hand in all things...” As James E. Faust puts it, “It is clear to me from this scripture that to ‘thank the Lord thy God in all things’ ( D&C 59:7 ) is more than a social courtesy; it is a binding commandment."  But like all of our loving Father in Heaven’s commandments, it is a commandment with tremendous promised blessings. He does not want us to be grateful for His benefit, but for our own. The thankful heart opens our eyes to a multitude of blessings that continually surround us.    

So another of gratitude’s magical attributes is its ability to save.  

Presiden Faust has said that gratitude as an expression of faith is a saving principle.   “As gratitude is absent or disappears, rebellion often enters and fills the vacuum....rebellion against moral cleanliness, beauty, decency, honesty, reverence, and respect for parental authority. A grateful heart is a beginning of greatness. It is an expression of humility. It is a foundation for the development of such virtues as prayer, faith, courage, contentment, happiness, love, and well-being.”

And just like when we’re talking about muscles or a testimony, it is also true with the principle of gratitude, “use it or lose it”.  

...there is a truism associated with all types of human strength: “Use it or lose it.” When not used, muscles weaken, skills deteriorate, and faith disappears. President Monson stated: “Think to thank. In these three words is the finest capsule course for a happy marriage, a formula for enduring friendship, and a pattern for personal happiness.”

Bonnie D. Parkin, former General Primary President said, “Gratitude requires awareness and effort, not only to feel it but to express it. Frequently we are oblivious to the Lord’s hand. We murmur, complain, resist, criticize; so often we are not grateful. In the Book of Mormon, we learn that those who murmur do not know “the dealings of that God who… created them.”  The Lord counsels us not to murmur because it is then difficult for the Spirit to work with us.  Luke chapter 17 records the experience of the Savior when He healed 10 lepers. As you recall, only one of the cleansed lepers returned to express his appreciation. Isn’t it interesting that the Lord did not say, “Your gratitude has made you whole”? Instead, He said, “Thy faith hath made thee whole.”

The leper’s expression of gratitude was recognized by the Savior as an expression of his faith. As we pray and express gratitude to a loving but unseen Heavenly Father, we are also expressing our faith in Him. Gratitude is our sweet acknowledgment of the Lord’s hand in our lives; it is an expression of our faith.”

Phillipians 4:6

6 Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.

The footnote for this verse says, “Don’t be unduly concerned about anything.”  Do your best and to God leave the rest.  He will always make up the difference. This is grace.  

3) How can we cultivate gratitude? PRAY FOR AND PRACTICE GRATITUDE

So how do we cultivate gratitude?

You may have heard this little saying, “What if you woke up today with only the blessings you thanked Heavenly Father for yesterday?”  Cultivate gratitude by starting with prayer. Ask Heavenly Father for a grateful heart. The Spirit can change your heart.   

We cultivate gratitude as we express it... much like the bearing of a testimony.  But unlike bearing a testimony, it doesn’t matter where you are “spiritually” speaking in order to express gratitude to Heavenly Father or others.  You may feel like the least “spiritual” person on the planet right now.  Maybe you are doubting. Maybe you are in the grips of depression. Maybe you have made a big mistake.  Maybe you are feeling very low right now.  Even if you are not,  I challenge you to try this little experiment.  It is like “Step #1” in starting your relationship with Heavenly Father, or rebuilding it, or just making it stronger.  Please, no matter how old or young you are... Try this experiment:  Practice praying and not asking for anything. Not one little thing. Don’t even let the word “please...” come out of your mouth. Don’t even ask for blessings on others’ behalf for this one prayer.   Just give thanks. That is all.  Try to think of every little (or big) thing in your day that your were grateful for.  Will they be material things you say you are thankful for? Perhaps. But consider what President Monson has taught:  

"Do material possessions make us happy and grateful? Perhaps momentarily. However, those things which provide deep and lasting happiness and gratitude are the things which money cannot buy: our families, the gospel, good friends, our health, our abilities, the love we receive from those around us. Unfortunately, these are some of the things we allow ourselves to take for granted.

The English author Aldous Huxley wrote, “Most human beings have an almost infinite capacity for taking things for granted.”"   

So as you say this prayer of gratitude, try hard to take nothing for granted. For “all good things come from God.” So if He has thought enough to bless you with it, no matter how small it may appear, should we not think enough to thank Him for it?

Now...

Notice how differently you feel as you conclude the prayer. You will feel differently. And you will like it.   I dare say it is “like magic”  how differently, and how much better you will feel.  

Now, do it again. Soon.  And again.

After you try this experiment with your prayers, try to use it in other areas of your life.  With your spouse, your children, your brothers and sisters, your classmates, your co-workers, your friends.  For one day ask nothing of them. Only express gratitude.  See what kind of magical thing that does for your relationships.  

One of the blessings that comes from living the commandment to live with gratitude is real, pure happiness.

President Uchtdorf in conference last month gave a memorable talk in which he said, "The happiest people I know are not those who find their golden ticket; they are those who, while in pursuit of worthy goals, discover and treasure the beauty and sweetness of the everyday moments. They are the ones who, thread by daily thread, weave a tapestry of gratitude and wonder throughout their lives. These are they who are truly happy."

The author Melody Beattie said,

“Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow.”

Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all others. We lift ourselves and others when we live in a spirit of Gratitude.

Presiden Monson has said, "The Lord has two homes: heaven and a grateful heart.”

When you choose to be grateful, you are opening your heart to others. It is in the fertile soil of gratitude that the seeds of charity are planted. When nourished by faith in Christ and gratitude for his infinite atonement on our behalf, the seeds of charity will grow and bloom to bless not only the lives of those you serve, but your own life as well. Everyone benefits from YOUR grateful heart, including you. It is a gift you can't help but give yourself when you are giving it to others. At this time of year when we start turning our minds to gift-giving, perhaps you can contemplate how to use the gift of gratitude to bless everyone around you.

Let us follow our Savior. Let us emulate His example. Let us obey His word. When we do this, we give to Him the divine gift of gratitude.

I can’t think of a better gift to give the Savior this holiday season than a thankful heart. A heart that walks, talks, and shares His love and His gospel.  The greatest gift we can give him is to be saved. To return to Him. To help Him in His work of bringing his children home is the one thing to give this eternal being who “already has everything”.   

I close with my testimony of the power of a grateful heart.  When we cultivate gratitude, we are cultivating charity. It is a commandment from our Heavenly Father to be grateful because He knows that is blesses all of our lives, makes us truly happy, and has the power to save us.  He will help us cultivate gratitude if we pray for and practice it.

As President Monson recently said, "My brothers and sisters, to express gratitude is gracious and honorable, to enact gratitude is generous and noble, but to live with gratitude ever in our hearts is to touch heaven."

I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.